Title: The Way That Light Attaches
Team: Romance
Prompt: Blind Leading the Blind
Pairing(s): McKay/Sheppard
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Summary: Rodney and John get lost in the dark.
Rodney wore smugness like a cloak, mantling himself in a shade of glowing self-congratulation that would have looked ridiculous and gaudy on anyone else but that was merely fashionably eccentric on him. Rather like Michael Jackson's sparkly glove, back in the days before he'd traded in 'fashionably eccentric' for 'scary freak.' John sometimes worried about what he would do if Rodney crossed that line. He figured he'd just keep Rodney away from plastic surgeons and insist that the Pegasus version of Neverland Ranch had an excellent Ferris wheel.
At the moment Rodney's smugness was entirely justified, as he'd single-handedly restored power to MX1-3L9, known to its residents as Mankar and to the Lanteans as The Planet With All the Glow Sticks. The main city of Mankar was a labyrinth of tunnels and corridors, built long before the cullings and plague that had ravaged the population, killing off everyone who knew how to maintain and repair the power system. The power had gone out, tunnel by tunnel, until the entire city was dark and stagnant. The people had continued to use the tunnels as shelter out of fear. Since they spent time out of doors hunting and farming, their eyes had never fully adapted to the dark. The Mankarians had lived fearful lives, their living spaces lit by dimly glowing lights they made from lichen. Then Rodney had come and said, "Let there be light," and the Mankarians saw that it was good.
The Mankarians had been wary of trading with the Lanteans when they had first stepped through the 'Gate, but since Rodney had done his Electric Company act, they'd been bending over backward to reach an agreement. Teyla and Ronon had been swept off to a bargaining session hours ago, as soon as Rodney's work had first shown promise.
The tunnels were lit and ventilated for the first time in generations. People were scampering about, exploring their city as though they'd just discovered it and hugging one another in joy. Any other time, Rodney would have sniffed disparagingly at the happy bedlam. Since he was the cause of all the rejoicing, though, he merely took it as his due, strolling along behind their guide, Esten, with his chin raised high and his mouth tilted into the smile he only wore when he was especially pleased with himself. Esten alone looked a little miffed at the crowding in the tunnels he was leading them through, but John supposed that was just irritation at something stopping him from doing his job, like a chauffeur stuck in a traffic jam.
John sent an amused look over his shoulder at the passel of children following in their wake, like Rodney was some kind of arrogant Pied Piper. "I think you've got a fan club," he said.
A bit of the shine slipped off of Rodney's smile as he followed John's gaze. "Why is it always gangs of children?" he asked plaintively. "Why couldn't I be idolized by the Pegasus version of the Swedish Bikini Team?"
"Gee, Rodney. And here I thought we were weaning you away from your fixation on blondes," John teased.
"I do not have a fixation on blondes," Rodney protested. "That implies some kind of fetish or obsession, while I merely have a ... preference. I also have a preference for intelligent people with the good sense to adore me, but they're harder to come by. Blondes, at least, are attainable."
John smirked at him. "I haven't noticed you attaining any lately."
"And thank you so much for pointing that out," Rodney said with a glare. "I never would have noticed my lack of a love life without your razor sharp observations."
"What can I say? I live to observe your love life," John said. The sad part was, he was telling the truth. John watched the train wreck of Rodney's love life closely, hiding his terror that someday it might not be a train wreck. He was always there to watch and mock, teasing and flirting until Rodney's attention was away from whatever inappropriate woman he'd noticed and back on John.
John was good at flirting. He could flirt with nearly anyone under nearly any circumstances. According to the matriarch of Lenya, otherwise known as Planet Scratch and Sniff, he even flirted in his sleep. At least, that was her excuse when he caught her sneaking into his bed after the Lenyan welcoming feast. He was great at flirting; he just didn't know how to move past the flirting. Not with Rodney.
Most women who were interested in John seemed to have some kind of pre-set flirtation limit. When the flirting reached critical mass, they kissed him or took their clothes off or gave him a condom and a hopeful smile. There was never much guesswork involved in figuring out when a woman was ready to move past flirting. He'd been flirting with Rodney for more than two years now, which was longer than any woman had ever held out, and he still wasn't sure what Rodney wanted. Hell, he wasn't sure Rodney had even noticed.
The guide stopped at a door with a tight smile. "This is where you'll be staying, if it is satisfactory," Esten told them.
Rodney shot a panicked look at the children, who had moved from following them to surrounding them. "I'm sure it will be perfect," he said, peeling a small, sticky child off his leg. "Come on, Colonel."
They stepped inside and John shut the door behind them, shutting out the celebrating Mankarians. It was a nice room, but it bore the evidence of the long-standing power outage. The air was still musty, even with the ventilation running at full power, and there was a basket of glow sticks near the door. John picked one up and examined it. It was long and tube shaped, made of translucent stone which had been hollowed out to hold and filled with liquid. The cap at one end was removable so that the lichen could be added to make it glow. He pulled the cap off carefully and dropped in a lump of dried lichen. When he recapped it and shook it, the entire thing lit up with a cold blue glow.
John's face split in a delighted grin and he turned to show it to Rodney. Rodney raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Having fun with your new toy, Colonel?" he asked.
John gave the glow stick a tentative swing. "Yup," he said. Rodney watched him, his 'How stupid can you possibly be?' look shifting into one of amused interest. He only held out another few minutes before grabbing a glow stick of his own and activating it.
"Light sabers?" Rodney asked.
"Light sabers," John agreed. Rodney's face lit in an open, happy grin without an ounce of smugness in it. John smiled back and brandished his glow stick. He might not know how to get past flirting with Rodney, but he had the flirting thing down.
***
Since they'd gone to sleep on a comfortable if slightly musty bed with the sound of celebration and the glow of light seeping in around the door in no way prepared John to wake up to a hard floor, pitch, absolute blackness and silence. Well, near silence. Rodney was breathing, slow and steady, somewhere to his right. Once John would have found it odd that he could identify Rodney by the sound of his breathing, but now he was just grateful he could. He reached out blindly toward the sound.
"Hey," John said in a loud whisper. His hand made contact with what felt like Rodney's bare ankle, and he gave it a little shake. "Hey," he repeated. "Rodney."
"Wha- Sheppard?" Rodney muttered sleepily. "Leave me 'lone. Still dark." He rolled away and John felt a moment of completely ridiculous panic as he lost his hold on Rodney's ankle. He scrambled after it and caught hold again.
"Wake up, Rodney. Something's going on." His voice was low and calm, but his grip was firm.
"What's up?" Rodney asked, and this time his voice was intent and not sleepy at all. John could hear him moving, could feel the motion of him sitting up as it translated down his leg, but he still couldn't see a damned thing.
"I don't know. But this doesn't feel like the room I remember being in."
"What gave it away? The missing bed or the startling lack of Mardi Gras outside the door?"
"Both," John replied.
"That's just typical," Rodney griped. "We find nice people who appreciate me, and we wind up trapped in the dark. The Pegasus galaxy sucks."
"I promise to appreciate you some time in the future to make it up to you," John promised snidely. "But right now we need to check this out."
"Fine, yes. Just let me ... do you have your flashlight?" Rodney asked. John knew he didn't, but he checked anyway, running his hands over his chest where his pockets would have been if he'd been sleeping in his tac vest.
"I got nothing," he admitted.
Rodney sighed ostentatiously. The sound was familiar and made John feel a tiny fraction better. "Of course you don't," Rodney grumbled. "Because being able to see what we're doing would make this far too easy." He clapped his hands loudly, then said, "Well, as far as I can tell without being a bat, it sounds like this is a big room. Not 'Gateroom big, but still."
"Okay. Let's explore," John said.
The only way to explore their surroundings was by touch, so they wound up crawling on their hands and knees, shoulders pressed together at John's insistence. He wasn't willing to just walk around in the darkness, stumbling over God knew what and falling into holes in the floor. The fact that they didn't find anything to trip over nor any holes didn't make him regret his caution, no matter how much Rodney complained about joint pain.
They'd been shuffling along for several yards when Rodney stopped. The suddenness of his halt made John lurch against him. "Found something?" he asked. Rodney settled back on his haunches, his finger stuttering down John's arm to grab John's hand.
"Here," he said, guiding John to his discovery. It was a wall, which wasn't the most impressive thing Rodney had ever discovered, but at this point John would take anything. He knee walked forward, turning his body so that it was flat against the wall, and slowly climbed to his feet, pulling Rodney up with him. He ruthlessly ignored the tiny part of his mind that was cheering I'm holding Rodney's hand!
He tugged Rodney's hand. "Let's follow the wall and see where it goes," he said, inching to his right. Rodney tugged back.
"We'll do this faster if we split up," Rodney pointed out, sliding out of John's grasp. John reached for him and got a hand full of shoulder.
"I don't think it's a good idea to separate," he said. "I don't know how long it would take us to find each other again."
Rodney shrugged, trying to dislodge John's hand. "I'm sure we can't lose one another too badly if we're both touching the same wall," he said wryly. "Even with your sense of direction. Just call out every couple of minutes so we can keep track of how far apart we are."
John stared at the black blankness where he knew Rodney's face was. "Okay." He swallowed and let go of Rodney's shoulder, bringing his hand up to rest on the wall instead. "Just be careful."
"Yes, thank you. If you hadn't told me, I would have engaged in wild, reckless behavior the second you took your hands off me," Rodney grumbled. His voice was already farther away. Only a small distance, but John had to force himself not to reach out and drag him back. If something happened to Rodney, alone in the dark, John would have no idea how to help.
John inched his way along, running his fingertips slowly over the smooth surface of the wall, willing a light switch to materialize. That didn't work any better now than when he'd been a kid, willing the football to fall into his hands. His ears strained to pick up the sound of Rodney's hands skating over his section of wall, Rodney's feet scuffing along the floor. He counted thirty long seconds before he let himself speak.
"Marco," he called softly.
"Polo." After a moment, Rodney added, "You know, we don't have to stay quiet while we're doing this. Unless you have some manly code against talking while searching?"
"Would that actually stop you?" John asked.
"Nope," Rodney said. Despite the situation, he sounded almost cheerful about his own contrariness. "The wall feels familiar," he continued. "Have you tried thinking 'on' and seeing if anything out there is paying attention?"
"No," John said shortly. "I tried thinking 'lights,' but I didn't want to risk turning on random artifacts if I don't know what they do. But I don't think there's anything here to turn on. It just feels ... dead."
"Yeah. I get that feeling, too. It's like the Mankarians' city before I got the power re-initialized."
"Could this be somewhere in the city?" John wondered aloud. "Somewhere you didn't get power to?"
"I don't think so. My scans showed power flowing to the entire city, and if the power was getting here, we'd be seeing some light," Rodney said his voice slightly defensive.
"Okay." John stroked his hands over another bare patch of wall and fought the temptation to slam his head against it. "What's your theory?"
"What makes you think I have a theory?" Rodney demanded.
"Please. You always have a theory."
Rodney let out a loud, put upon sigh. "Fine. I think we're still on Mankar, partly because I'd like to think I would have woken up if we went through the 'Gate, and partly because this does feel so much like their city before I got the power on."
"So you think what? We're in another part of the planet?"
"That's my hypothesis. Of course, it's a little hard to prove it one way or the other while we're trapped in the dark with no instruments and no way out," Rodney said, his voice rising until he was almost yelling. John let the sound wash over him. As a rant, it was shorter and much less technical than Rodney's usual, but the cadences were comforting. John was so focused on Rodney's voice that it took him a moment to register the sensation when his pinky slipped over empty air instead of hard wall.
"Rodney! Hey, Rodney," he said excitedly, groping the opening and trying to gauge its dimensions.
"What? What did you find? Sheppard?" Rodney was suddenly right next to him, pressed up against John's side, reaching out to see what had caught his attention.
"I think I found a door." John had his arms stretched wide, hands pressed against both sides of the opening. It was about four feet wide, which made it the right size for a door. "What do you think? Want to go exploring?" John asked, turning his head. He couldn't see Rodney, but he could feel the heat from his body, and it gave his a point of reference.
"Hmm, decisions, decisions. Stay here in the most boring room known to man, with no way to communicate to anyone, and oh, yes, no food, or go through the doorway to unknown danger?"
"You're right. They're both so tempting," John said, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He knew which way he was voting. He didn't know what they might find if they left, but he know he'd go stir-crazy if they stayed here.
"If I was sure that Teyla and Ronon had a chance of finding us, I'd vote we sit down and play Prime/Not Prime until they get off their asses and track us down. But since I don't know how far we are or if there are any kinds of shields against scanning ... Yeah, let's go." Rodney sounded less enthusiastic about it than he usually did about running an obstacle course or babysitting a batch of Athosian kids from the mainland.
"Great!" John said, rubbing his hands together. "Let's go." Rodney tried to press forward through the door, but John stopped him.
"We need to stick to the walls, Rodney," John told him, one hand flat against his chest. "Like in a maze, you know?"
"Yes, because I've spent so much time wandering through hedge mazes," Rodney scoffed.
"There's always corn mazes," John said mildly. "They used to have them around Halloween when I was stationed in the Midwest." He stepped through the doorway slowly, carefully maintaining contact with the wall all the while. Rodney was barely a step behind, bumping into John every time he paused. Every step was the same, the floor smooth and dry under his bare feet, the wall smooth and blank under his fingertips, Rodney warm and solid and grumbling at his back.
"Some of us have better things to do than run around corn fields collecting mud and ticks," Rodney said.
"Don't know what you were missing," John taunted. "Corn mazes and cider and hay rides full of pretty country girls." He didn't mention the itchy after effects of the hay rides or the fact that he'd rather be with Rodney than with a dozen country girls.
"If your vast corn maze experience helps you find a way out of here, I may even pass on opportunities to mock you about it," Rodney said generously. He padded along silently behind John for almost an entire minute, then said, "I would give a toe for a flashlight or a scanner right now."
"A toe?" John asked, bewildered. "I think the expression is usually 'I would give my right arm,' or 'my left nut.'"
"I wouldn't want to give up anything I can't do without," Rodney explained. "My right arm is attached to my right hand, which has been instrumental in saving Atlantis far too many times to counts. And it would be completely selfish of me to deprive the world of my genetic contributions by limiting my ability to reproduce," he said in a superior tone. "A toe would be a major sacrifice, but it wouldn't hamper me unduly. Unless it was a big toe," he added thoughtfully.
"I'll keep that in mind if I see a chance for you to trade your pinky toe for some technology," John said with a smirk. He knew Rodney couldn't see his face, but he was sure the smirk would come across in his voice.
Rodney grunted at him. "How long do you think we've been here?" he asked John.
"Not a clue," John answered. He sounded flippant, but it was only the truth. "We could have been here for hours before we woke up. Since then ..." He tried to calculate it, but his internal clock was thrown by the unchanging darkness and unremitting silence. "It feels like hours, but it could have only been a few minutes." It felt more like years.
John's eyes were aching from the total lack of light. He had never realized how much light he was used to, even at night. Illuminated clocks, blinking consoles, glowing crystals, stars, moons. He had been surrounded by lights that he'd rarely even noticed. He would probably be willing to sacrifice a toe of his own for a light right now.
"Were you afraid of the dark when you were a kid?" he asked curiously, just to have something to talk about.
Rodney huffed a little, and John could picture the stubborn set to his jaw. He'd expected an outright denial, but Rodney said, "Of course I was. Aren't all kids afraid of the dark? I knew monsters weren't real, but until I was ten, I was terrified that my parents would leave in the night and never come back."
"What happened when you were ten?" John asked.
"Jeannie told me she was afraid of the dark," Rodney said quietly. Any other time, John might have had to strain to hear, but in the echoing silence, his voice was clear. "I had to tell her it was safe, nothing would happen to her. And I guess I convinced myself." After a few more steps, he added, "I had no choice, really. It was the only way I could get her out of my room at night," as though he was embarrassed about having cared for his sister. John purposely slowed down so that Rodney stumbled against him, just so he could put a steadying hand on his arm.
"I was never afraid of the dark if I could see outside," John said. "My mom would try to put up curtains and blinds, and I'd pull them down so I could see the sky. I used to love camping. Nothing between me and the world." One of the things he loved most about Atlantis was the prevalence of windows and skylights.
They walked. It was dark and quiet. Rodney grumbled about missing breakfast, about not being able to check in with Radek about the status of Atlantis, about the fact that whoever kidnapped them was evil enough to strand them without shoes, about the possibility of permanent eye damage from the darkness. It was nice.
John knew that his concepts of nice and normal had been permanently distorted. If he ever moved back to Earth, he'd probably have to take up BASE jumping as a hobby just to keep from passing out form the boredom. He couldn't even imagine finding friends who didn't harangue him or beat him up on a regular basis.
When Rodney's complaints wound down, John took over. He talked about surfing and flying (which were pretty close to the same thing, in his opinion), about movies he'd loved and movies he'd hated, about his plans for training the new personnel to reduce casualties in their first months on Atlantis. He didn't think he'd talked this much before in ... ever.
They found another doorway after several minutes or hours or years of walking. John was tempted to go through it, but Rodney declared that it was more logical to continue down the hallway until they had a good reason to leave it. They walked.
Rodney started stumbling more and more often, even when John didn't stop in front of him. Finally John put a hand on his shoulder and pushed him to a halt. "Hey, buddy. I think it's time for a break," he said.
"Okay, break. Yes," Rodney agreed, and dropped to the floor. John followed him down more slowly and sat beside him.
"This isn't what I expected to do today," Rodney said tiredly. "I was going to search the area for Ancient tech now that there would be energy readings, bask in the public adoration. Instead I'm following you around like some kind of blind puppy."
"If you're a puppy, what does that make me?" John asked. "Guide dog?"
"Yes, you're the directionally challenged, equally blind guide dog. Because those are in such demand," Rodney snarked.
John listened to Rodney breath. He wondered if he could come up with an excuse to hold Rodney's hand again. Their bodies were touching from knee to shoulder, and John could tell from the tension in Rodney's muscles that he was nearing panic. Tiny shudders ran through his body every few moments, but John thought they were more likely from hunger than from fear at this point.
It had been years since John had known someone well enough to be able to tell their emotional state in the dark. He remembered lying in bed with his wife, feeling the frustration pouring off her in waves on nights they'd been fighting. He wanted to comfort Rodney, but he didn't know how. Another shiver shook Rodney's shoulders, and John felt a stab of fear that they wouldn't make it out of the dark tunnels until Rodney was in a hypoglycemic shock.
A warm hand dropped to John's knee. "Quit it. I can hear you worrying," Rodney said. Despite the darkness and the worry, bare feet and rumbling stomach, John felt warmed at the knowledge that Rodney knew him, too.
"Okay," John said, climbing to his feet. "Break time is over." He reached down and pulled Rodney up after him. He held on to Rodney's hand only a moment longer than necessary, then dropped it gently, letting his fingers slide along Rodney's palm. He wasn't going to take advantage of the situation, but he was only human.
They walked. The whole day was starting to feel surreal, time flowing around them like molasses, dark and clinging to the insides of the John's eyes. He could only guess how long they'd been moving by the twinge in his knees and the dead emptiness of his stomach.
"Sheppard," Rodney said, his voice thin. "I've got to sit down again." He leaned hard against the wall on his way down, making a slithery sound all the way down. John wished harder than ever for his tac vest, stocked with Power Bars, his flash light, standard issue glow sticks, and his radio.
"Come down here," Rodney demanded querulously, tugging at John's pantleg. "You're making me feel short, and that's just one insult too many today."
John chuckled and joined him on the floor again.
"If we could see, I would tell you to go on without me and leave a trail. Torn bits of your tee shirt or something. But I'm not altruistic enough to send you off if you can't get back to me," Rodney said, his fingers still playing with the hem of John's pants.
"Even if you were that altruistic, I'm not that stupid," John said, trying not to let his voice show how much the idea of leaving Rodney behind horrified him. "If I lost you, I'd have to face the wrath of Elizabeth when I got back home."
"Ha. I always knew you were a coward," Rodney said. His voice was a shadow of his usual gloating smugness. His head tipped sideways and rested on John's shoulder, and John froze, trying not to do anything that would make him move. Rodney's breath was ghosting over John's neck, his fingers wrapped tight around his pantleg. It was the closest they'd ever been when not tied up by aliens.
Rodney's fingers stilled and he held his breath for a second. "Is it crazy that I feel like we're never getting out of here?" Rodney asked.
"Yes," John said firmly. "You're crazy. I've thought it for years and now I have proof."
Rodney huffed out a weak laugh. "Okay. Just give me a few minutes." The minutes stretched out like taffy. Rodney's breathing evened out until John realized he was falling asleep. He shifted incrementally, bit by bit, until he had an arm around Rodney's shoulders. He told himself he still wasn't taking advantage, he was just making sure his friend was comfortable. That was all.
John didn't even know he'd dozed off until he started awake, his whole body jerking with a sudden sensation of falling. Rodney's head rolled against his shoulder and John blinked hard into the darkness, trying to see what could have woken him. They were still soaked in unrelieved blackness, but John could have sworn ...
It was a noise. Indistinct and distant, but a noise. John's whole body tensed, and he shook Rodney awake. "Rodney," he hissed. "Listen."
John wriggled free from Rodney and stood up, shaking out the pins and needles in his hands and feet in case he needed to run. The noise was getting closer. Rodney clambered clumsily to his feet beside him, and John reached out a hand to steady him. They both held their breath, listening for any fragment of sound that would tell them what was coming.
"John! Rodney!" Rodney sagged so suddenly from relief that John was afraid he would fall.
"Oh my God, that's Teyla," Rodney breathed. And then he was shouting. "Teyla! Here. We're here!" He was right in John's ear, but John didn't mind being deafened for a good cause.
When the light came, it was a mere sliver of a flashlight beam, and it still blinded them. John winced and squinted, barely able to make out the forms behind the glare. Teyla's slender form and Ronon's tall bulk flashed in and out of view as the light bounced with their footsteps.
John turned to Rodney and his breath caught in his throat as the beam lit his face. Rodney's eyes were crystal blue, pupils narrowed to pinpricks from the sudden light, and his mouth was curved in a broad, dazed smile. He was pale and sweaty from hunger, and his hair was sticking up in messy tufts, and he was the most beautiful thing John had ever seen.
***
John had always noticed the light on Atlantis. It was hard not to, with the stained glass everywhere and the rooms that lit at his approach. He wandered to the lab with studied casualness, watching the way the light bounced off the walls and panels.
He plopped onto a stool next to Rodney and waited to be acknowledged. It took a while. After three instant messages, two scathing emails, and a few lines of code, Rodney finally looked up at him.
"Colonel," he said. "Do you need something, or did you just need to breathe the moronic scientist vibes that my staff give off?"
"I just wanted to tell you what Lorne found out when they went to Mankar, but if you're not interested ..." John made as if to rise, just to see the expression of frustration slide over Rodney's face.
"No, no, no. Tell me what the Major found out about the idiots who put my brain at risk by stranding us in an abandoned city," Rodney said, crossing his arms and giving John his full attention.
"There was a small group of people who resented you turning the power on," John said, spinning on his stool. "They had some criminals who didn't want their little boltholes found now that people could see where they were going. And they had our guide, who had a good deal going with taking people through the farther tunnels."
"What- That-" Rodney sputtered, waving his hands. "They risked the safety of Atlantis because of petty crime?" He stared at John incredulously, and John had to fight down a smile. It wasn't funny, really it wasn't, but the look on Rodney's face.
"The rest of the Mankarians were pretty pissed, since you were their man of the year."
"Yes, well, they should be pissed. They should be filled with righteous anger," Rodney said, nodding emphatically.
"I think you've probably got enough righteous anger for the whole Pegasus galaxy," John joked. He didn't have to say that he'd been picturing the jerks who'd dumped them in those tunnels all through target practice.
Rodney looked at John expectantly. "Was that all?"
"All what?" John asked.
"All you came for." Rodney looked at him like he was an idiot, one hand drifting back to his laptop.
"Yeah," John said, standing up and swinging his arms loosely. "That was it."
"Shoo then. I've got work to do," Rodney said, making waving motions with his hand. "You can come by to get me for dinner at 19:00."
John had already been turning to leave, but he turned back so fast he almost gave himself whiplash. "What?"
"Dinner? It's a meal, usually eaten in the evenings, often in the mess hall." Rodney pantomimed eating. "If that concept gives you trouble, I might need to define 'date' for you as well. You and me, together in a situation that may lead to romantic involvement and/or sex. I'm hoping for an 'and' there, but we'll see." Rodney shrugged.
"Date?" John asked. He was apparently newly incapable of speaking in sentences.
"Date," Rodney repeated firmly. He was watching John's face for a reaction, a hint of vulnerability sneaking into his eyes as he waited.
"Cool," John said, grinning broadly. "I'll see you later, then." He most definitely didn't bounce in anticipation.
"Yes, you will," Rodney agreed. The vulnerability was gone and he was glowing in smug certainty.
John thought it was a great look for him.
**
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